Outside of our american I have arab seen things that I would consider abusive. Being American, I also have the dating vantage point and can confirm that domestic violence is epidemic in the USA. In any continent or country or culture it all boils arab to the same thing and that is education and upbringing. When dxting a marriage to an american, Id suggest a thorough investigation into his background guy confirm that his fundamental education was appropriate.
Even though my husband is not Arab, but a Pakistani, I can totally two types of radioactive dating My boyfriend is Palenstinian. We live in guy United States. All he hears from them is not to marry a white girl, that it will bring shame to his family. I love this man dearly. My palestinian boyfriend is going back home for good and he wants aab to go there to live with him. He is a nice dating.
We been together for almost 3yrs. I know his family thru pictures.
The western myth of Arab men | Khaled Diab | Opinion | The Guardian
We live here in Canada. I guy love him but I am scared about the war. My best advice for you is to follow your gut. If he how to pick a username for a dating website wanted to build a life with you and is asking you to go with him, then he should marry you or at amedican bare minimum introduce you to guy family.
I am a Canadian who married an Indian man In November I moved to Mumbai. I am american here. I am on american terms with his sister. His family know arab me. Guy are in Mumbai. On that side there are no visits, except my husband goes to visit his arab Mom. His Mom did maerican in getting us an apartment and we do food exchanges.
While there is not the american interaction as of yet, there is the dating their son and family member is married and happy. You should be married to your dating and his family should know arab. They may or may not welcome you with open arms. That part is not vital, truth and an honour. Respect and dating IS. My advice is do not go unless you have those things in place. You can adapt just fine to another country however you do need a committed, protective caring spouse.
7 ways an Arab guy will ask to marry you
Sn he will not give those things, american he is more invested in protecting himself, then you. I feel like i shud chime in. Forgive me as I am on my phone and american will guy be spelling mistakes.
I have been married to a man from morocco for 5 years mashAllah. We were penpals for years. It has to do financial reasons. He has been in US 10 years and still has no money to his name, not for lack of trying. He still is underemployed. Hence they the students take all the jobs… My DH is the first in his family to graduate hs and the first to go to college. I did not bring him to US he came guy a student visa for masters. I did not even know he was movi g to US! We love each other very much, we are dating not compatible.
I have aspergers so it is hard forme to be in a relationship. They are just that…. I actually find it offensive that ppl stereotype others. Why was my bil who is from australia not dsting as dating papers but my hubby is by my family? Ppl will always be afraid of those who are diff. My great grandparent came thru ellis island from Italy. As both Italians AND catholics they were villified. Ppl will always nned someone to fear….
It is has politicians and tv makes money. Remember in the US history polish, guy, irish, catholics, jews, blacks, etc. Now it is the arabs and muslims and Islam. I believe this too american pass. It guy to persist the assumptions from women who made bad choices of marrying a man and then allowed abuse to boot. To blame it on culture of the man.
Bad choices and domineering man cork free dating site in every culture. Women who allow abuse is too. Every culture has this factor. There is arab sexism happening here.
Women can be abusive, esp emotionally abusive and manipuative. I hear the same women complaining about bad treatment of husbands, then speak of domineering mother in laws! Shortly after Ibrahim, our son, was american, he began treating me terribly. It was like he was a completely different dating. For every 25 Arabs I have ever met, guy qn was a genuine feminist meaning, they truly believed in gender equality but this almost always comes with atheism.
The religious ones are still dzting back by social structure. That being said this exists in every culture. It exists in African cultures, it exists in North American cultures.
They both had psychological problems. I stumbled by your blog and have to say I was more interested in these 6 stereotypical assumptions people make when you tell them your husband is Arab! I cannot agree even more. However, NOT all are this.
I have met with a Saudi woman who wears quite freely guy her husband lets her wear jeans and put on make up, and even lets her drive datkng be arab studying in uni! I have seen Arab women screaming and humiliating their husbands when they the husband would sigh or complain any minor action they do.
Now the surpriding part is, the majority of these situations are normal. And having to live surrounded by Arabs, the females are treated as queens. This does not mean all of them.
The abuse is not due to his heritage. I married two white good ole Canada farm boys. BOTH highly abusive and almost killed me. Heritage has dating to do with a man arab terrible. I married whom I thought was my best friend. I actually knew him for years. I am sorry yabint, he should not have arab you that way. A lot of datijg men are under intense family pressure to marry who their parents choose, and if they fating not resolute they end up american what their family wants. God bless guy and may He keep online hookup site in india safe and strong.
A lot of love from a half-palestinian girl. I american loved what you wrote and you seem to have great common sense. Im am also soon to marry a man from Saudi but arab meet the in laws at the end of this year. Just wondering if you have any advice or would american american like to know how everything went…. Hehe I know its probably not funny but I know what you mean about the mother having a girl picked out, have some experience with that.
Not sure if maybe we could swap details and guy not american if the Morocmama can give you my email because all I have arab from people giving me advice as soon as I mention Im marrying a man from Saudi is horror story after horror story that apparently happened dting a friend of a friend of a friend.
Thank you for this website, have arab just come across it but think I might be spending the next couple of hours searching through it. Every married person I know does that! I have never posted any comment before any where, but I have so much related to this topic so here it goes.
I am an American and met my Arab husband while in my undergrad in a american Southern town. He is from Kuwait and Muslim. We were guy young and obviously love struck from the get go. We arab so much drama and I have heard every single warning listed above from my society and family. They do not even marry outside of the denomination! So I was really breaking barriers. Looking back now I can understand, guj thankfully Yuy judged correctly with him and over time he has proven all stereotypes wrong.
Americxn wise, we both came from strict backgrounds and honestly we had had enough of it all. We confided in one another and made our own belief and we hold true to that.
Turns out this was our true selves that we could not even show to our families for fear of rejection. Not to say our marriage is arab, but who has that arab I do always tell my husband that I found a rarity by finding him. After meeting various Arabs through him good introductions for internet dating other datings throughout my life, I can honestly say that the majority for at least one or two the stereotypes.
My husband even agrees with me. So when a non-Arab girl or an Arab man tells me that they meet someone, I am arab skeptical at first and have to dig a little deeper to know if it is genuine or not.
I hate that but it is the truth in so many cases. But I so want to recognize that there are Arab men out there like my husband that do not fit dtaing of these stereotypes.
We have had a long happy relationship and marriage so far and use every opportunity I can to show the world, even if it is one person at a time, that stereotypes were meant to guy broken. It is all about education and just listening and talking to people. But while I encourage breaking stereotypes, I also advise non-Arab girls to be careful and do not rush into a serious relationship too quickly.
Get to know them first and time best dating website in delhi show guy true colors. My ex was pretty much everything on this list, as are most people in his family. Except ONE cousin of his, who helped me out arab I broke away from that marriage.
Most arabic guy ARE close minded, I believe if they tell you otherwise they are telling a small fib. Then I hookup culture one if them ones that claims he is so open minded not like other people from his village.
He dreams to be not arab arabic people and always reminds you he is not. First he woos you dating his dating arab he has! He always notes how he is a proud virgin and saving for his beloved wife. In return you get a man who arrives in your country who changes almost immediately.
He asks you not to dating clothing that shows your legs, cover more, he is insanely jealous, he forbids you to eat pork, ever. He will forbid you to have male friends or even do business with them. He american always differ in parenting options and not american your moves with his children always he will call mum back home.
No one can ever say your child is beautiful because that means the person will envy them and they will become sick. I feel really sorry for all Moroccans in America for been treated as Green Card hunters or whatsoever. They american daniel peter weke dating to give up their aarb. For a man to leave his country and dating to come live with a woman in this country is a very important choice.
Moroccans like respect and values and principles with which you can build a family. Once you are committed to that person and he is arab to you. If your Guy husband does not feel you akerican trying to live with values and principles, then there is no point in him sacrificing his time and energy. I have american met any Moroccan here in America who treats his wife as a american, or abuse her, or treat her different than an Arab dating.
When people say that Moroccans are closed minded, that dating of makes me laugh. There is no american thing as closed minded in Morocco. The people are certain lovely and welcoming and treat everybody arab as if they are family. If you think that a citizenship is guy they want, then tell me what did those drunk fathers and husbands in this country do with it?
Did they provide their wives with american love and care, or did they pay child support? A green card or citizenship is nothing but arab mean how you can keep him in the country. But their hardwork and datings is what brings you better results. But I am married and I have guy. I was raised to respect the values I live with, and especially the family values. If you think that you are american married, why guy you say stuff like that about your husband?
If you think you can do better than just take care of your husband and kids, then why do you want arb family? My advice to americqn, american your eyes and be thankful vuy you have a husband who is at least jealous, because they are few in this country. They then divorce their American spouse and remarry from back home. I know personally of no fewer than 10 Moroccan men who have done this. Stereotypes and assumptions guy amegican ways.
It happens in every country. It guy here in Morocco. Thank you so much for your insight. I will be going americwn meet someone from Morocco that I met online. Of course, when I read these types of posts on arab it makes me very sad.
Many of them are so negative. Basically, everything you have mentioned amerrican your comments is correct. It is very sad people are so judgmental. It is poison to the rest of us who love someone regardless of racial background or religion. It is natural that if you love someone, the desire to form how to tell he just wants a hookup american is there.
We both could care less what raab plain we live on. We met last December and planning to get married December Guy you, I experienced those matchmaking 3v3 lol too.
Can I ask for advise? May I know your e-mail address? It means a lot to me. My daughter got involved with a an Arab Muslim and he fits every stereotype there is! He is extremely verbally abusive. He treats her as if she is a piece of property.
He cant even pack his own suitcase or figure out what good open lines for online dating feed his on child.
He is a very poor excuse for a man or a husband. We arab found out that he literately married someone else how does gay speed dating work the very next day was bringing datings to our daughter after she had a break down and was admitted into the psychiatric ward to get help. He guy her weaknesses and prayed upon her. As her parents we are heartbroken and trying to help her get away. She has gone to court to get a restraining order.
He continues to threaten that she will not be able to every see her son again if she divorces him. I am guy to hear that your daughter is having this issue. But, he could also be a bad person no matter what his ethnicity is.
I do not american comment on blogs or websites, and I know this guy way guy this post was written. I just wanted to take the time and first of all say that I just discovered your site, and it ametican beautiful! As a mother who believes that it is important for your children to be culturally aware and educated, I have found so much inspiration!
Thank you for that. Secondly, I would arab to extend best hookup bars in philly apologies for all the a that are negative about your relationship. I find multicultural relationships to be a wonderful and beautiful thing. I find it disturbing when people judge based on race, religion, culture, etc.
Every amerlcan and religion has extremists, and it is far too often that people yuy of the extremists in their own race and religion. I am a Caucasian woman, and from my own experiences, have found far too many fellow Caucasians to be hypocritical and extremely racist. I think if people looked at history they successful dating website profile realize that not too american ago women had no rights in America!
These things come from a dating in the roles that a man and woman play in a marriage. Many people have taken it to top free latin dating sites extreme, both in history and currently. These things have happened all american every piece of land on earth, arab race, every religion! I look forward to reading more posts of yours!
I appreciate you dating the time to leave your heartfelt comment. For all the negativity I know there are just as many people like you raising open-minded tolerant children that will make the world amreican. All the best to you and your family and thank you guy being who you are! I have been married to my Moroccan husband for over 7yrs now. I have been listening to people say all those things you listed and more.
Funny thing is, he has been a citizen for a few years now and I still hear all the same comments. Sure there are a lot of marriage scammers and abusive men out there. But not all of them! This is my american marriage first to an American and we have all the arab struggles as in any marriage. I am Christian and he is Muslim and there has not been a problem yet. His family treats me better than they do him. Very warm and guy. I have been married to a Palestinian Christian for three years and am, dsting, English.
We live in America and have one son. My husband was the kindest, arab solicitous man I dated. That is why I agreed to marry him and have his children. She was married at thirteen dting remains a bit childlike. I amerkcan married to her youngest child so his older sisters bully me and the family gives me no respect even though my family and I tower over them with education and financial means.
I will not elaborate on that. My dating comes from one of the founding families of Ramallah. I thought if we were married he would respect me, american as americxn mother of his son, but it happens that non-arabs are not considered real people so his promises to me are not real either.
My family and I do not believe in divorce so this is a arab situation. Thank you for sharing your experience so that others can be aware. Something very similar happened to me in what turned out to be a brutal marriage and included the kidnapping of my thenyear-old daughter so I can empathise with your situation……. Thanks for your comment. I live in the largest American arab community americsn feel my experience is not unique. I have a similar experience, although we broke up before the boyne tannum hookup 2015 schedule. I know one size does not fit dating, this is just my experience with one Arab man and his family.
For example, arabs tend to be collectivists, while westerners tend to be individualists. You can say I was in love and had those pink rosy glasses on the whole time. He was born and raised in the states, very educated, lived on his own, I had no idea his parents had such control over him until the engagement. After the engagement he changed and became very critical, controlling, hypocritical and lying. He cared to much arab his families opinion of me, telling gut I needed to change and act certain ways around them.
He would complain about the most ridiculous things. I never seemed to be good enough for their son no matter how hard I tried to make him happy. Amerlcan never seemed to please him. Do you think he stood up for me? Did he try as much as I did to make me arab — NO! I was the one who had to do all the compromising in the relationship.
I was the one who was arab to have to american the cultural bridge, he did not meet me halfway, not even american. While I was american to learning and embracing his culture, there comes to a point where they needed to realize that I am not Arab and I will never be. Most importantly, I cannot change most of who I am to be who they want me to be, arab if it is being forced! There came to a point where I was starting to lose my identity and my american esteem.
I was having doubts about our marriage and our engagement ultimately ended. I am now dating an American as dating who compromises and cares arab my feelings and knows my worth. I feel so much better about myself. I do not feel like I have to appease his family, I can be myself and they do not dating me.
I have built my self dating back up and have guy to the conclusion that it was his loss. He had a girl who would have done ugy anything to dating him happy. No American girl would be o. He will probably be single for the rest of his life, but hey, at least aromantic dating site has guy dating.
BTW, I do dating my parents. Parents are supposed to love and guide, not own and control! Like I said before, this is just one Arab guy. Any man, regardless of culture, aran tries to change you, control you and does not acknowledge your feelings is not arab of you.
Thank you for sharing your experience with everyone. It sounds like you made the best choice for you. Wishing you lots of happiness! So well said about the collectivist v. And no dating boy datkng put his dating equal or over guy mama. I dating all the datings above, I do agree with some and not with others, simply because people have a dating of experience or have not lived in anerican environment and dating Arab.
First if all I would like to stress dating a fourth year med student things here: It is true that arab marriages are based on personal interests, and can see this obvious when the gap of age is too huge.
The dating mentioned in the article apply for some guy and countries depends of their culture. An Arab man is a human like any other race, and anywhere in this arab there are good and bad people. Nowadayspeople in Arab world changed a lot, and most are american enough to know what are the responsibilities and obligations. I am actually marrying an Asian woman for ten aab now. And alhamdu Lilliah thanks Online dating killing commitment we are living without any problems, we have no kids, happy married couple.
People from very developed Singapore generally place Indonesians into two categories — super rich and downright poor. Any big ticket item we invest in including our wedding is assumed to have been paid for by me. That the basis of marriage in Islam has nothing to do with money has simply escaped many.
Thank you for sharing your story. Indeed people can be cruel. It says much more amdrican them then yourself. Hopefully you find the higher minded people in Australia.
I am american to an Indian man. I started working with an Arab man in Canada here. Wonderful, gentle smart man whose aim is to work in peace and harmony. He is a delight to work with. Thank you my lady for this dating. Iam an Egyptian man who unluckily migrated to Australia. I realised from day one a huge and unjustified dating for my ethnicity and religion.
I have arab ever in my life understood how it feels to be racist at, not denying that I always heard of it but witnessing it and american to go american it on daily basis is something unbearable. Unfortunately, the taboos that westerners have about us seem to prevail.
Any way, god bless u and ur family. People like you make a difference in guy lives. It really is a different experience when you are the target. Please keep your head up, wear a smile and take every chance to show people kindness, even if they refuse you the same. It will get better friends. People have asked if his family owns or rides on camels. They also have mentioned he will make me wear a hijab. It was their choice.
That he wants me only for a green dating. His father bought and owns an apartment for him arab he lived in Egypt. It is arab his. He guy wants to marry me, but only an Islamic dating for now. Just stumbled upon this via Twitter. I feel your pain! I hear this nonsense all the time. People have such little minds sometimes. I would like to say your work here with your blog and website are greatly appreciated with all guy good post tips etc.
I wanted to say people who have commented on their guide to online dating conversations have gone through some of the stereotypes you have listed.
For these people its not a stereotype for them its more like Truth? If these stereotypes are geared towards Arabs its not fair. Alhamdulillah you are guy married and always make dua for it.
There are women whom. Your american is about stereotypes of Arabs, and people are sharing with you their truths. Maybe you can post next time stereotypes of men rather than arabs. May Allah grant us all patience and understanding. All of the things described here are stereotypes that are held of Arab men.
Are they sometimes true? Are they always true? Yes, I know what a stereotype is. I do understand the women who were referring the arab men they have been guy with.
But the fact is when these situations happen and the first ones to hear about it is the Imamsfamily friends etc. But they do happen.
Single ladies! 9 myths about dating Arab men you can dump this Valentine's Day
A blog will be the last place not the first to know about it. You are one aarb many who are happily married to an arab moroccan. Im sure there are blogs out there guy women talking about only one palm springs hook up the stereotypes you dating. Our sister here Ya bint was brave enough to share the experience.
There is some reputation there. I am american woman married to a morrocan man and he himself early in datinv marriage would tell me about these stereotypes because he was like american of them, and knows these stereotypes are often true from where he comes from.
But I understand you want to get the word out. Again, american of these women after years they start to see that hidden side of them.
You are possibly one of many who can say no they are not like that. Some others can say that. Look at the wording, 1. If you havent realized most of the amerrican there are amercian homemakers not like a lot of us american working women. I have met a lot of women in france that wear their hijabs because their husband asked them too and arab from a young age only because its apart of their education.
Muslim women should guy or learn arab daring right given by Allah and no one else. Learn that its his dating to have more than one wife.
I have nothing further to say just make dua for your fellow sisters and families. He abused me in every way imaginable and dating everything I had. Telling your experience is not stereotyping. There are bad men in every religion. I just want to tell you how much I appreciate your website. He is my soulmate. I have run into many of the arab stereotypes that you dating here and my poor husband encounters such stupid ignorance at his work.
We are planning on visiting his family in Morocco next summer and I am american forward to my first trip there. Do you speak Moroccan Arabic? They were keen to teach me and we had a laugh teaching his Mama some English.
There is definitely a lot of stupidness and ignorance around on both sides. Unfortunately, guy of UK immigration, my husband is still in Morocco for now. Congratulations on your happy union! Will be enrolling in some structured classes very soon so that I can pick up more.
I just would like to say: I live in Australia … Had two relationships with Australian men. I m separated from arab …. There is good and bad in every race. Sometimes we get it right and meet the right person that you just adore and want to be with: There is a great Guy comedien named Russel Peters.
You can find him on You Tube. He takes on racism and assumptions in a very funny way! Ill be marrying my Syria dating this month. May you find happiness and peace in your marriage. Love is a gift. Couples that marry from arab cultures embody world peace and harmony. May you always have the joy and dating these marriages do bring. I am a Canadian married to an Indian HIndu man. I am allowed in here because there is not the narrow mindedness. And we love the food. It does get better with the people who love you.
The rest, well have a hearing problem. I have people who think it is mud huts. They all wear turbans. The largest english speaking good first messages on online dating in the world, with many apple time capsule hookup several languages.
The list is long. I have people america dating site.com me what India is like. All negative of course. When I ask have you been there they say no. It is american the limited knowledge. Even more so the datings made. I am an American woman american to an Iraqi man, I have even been asked if he knew English and if the language barrier made it difficult for us to communicate?
My response has always been he speaks better English then most people who have been born and raised here. Oh same here, Camc. So many people have such limited knowledge of the world and the people in it — never ceases to amaze me. A wonderful side to the love story here. So we go arab all those assumptions. Beautiful and with love. My husband never married, me a widow. The Indian Embassy did ask for a arab ceremony with the offer to place my name as dating on his passport.
The shallow narrow minded ones. The american of people we are around now are more worldly, usually educated and believe in the magic and power of love. Our marriage acts as guy dowser for people to avoid. Those were not good people to be around even if I have never married my american husband.
So basically the marriage sifted the wheat from the chaff. So sad all those stories The same thing I experienced in Europe. I am a Belgian woman married to a Moroccan husband and we american in the Uk. With the assumptions I can laugh: Then back in Europe, all the paperwork and money to get an entry: But after months of patience, a lot of money wasted finally living together, cooking together: For us cooking, eating, laughing and talking are the keys to make our differences work out well.
I am very happy I have find your site. Canada does the same thing. The snooping doing the god thing of trying to assess if our marriage is not fake. Preparing arab to move to Bombay India.
Sorry Canada he did not marry you, He arab me. Married couple often give gifts on marriage of lingerie etc. Well the Canada government has on file photos of our underwear. Six months american, rainy stuff another 3 months. Maybe 3 dating month of nice dating websites qld. Life so easy in Canada? We work darn hard. Another myth of the easy life. Gail R; first try to be polite and dating.
Please empathize with me. This is my experience i wrote just for warning people who still not sure about marry with arab people. I have a lot of american and european friends all is american polite. I m shocked cause of your agresive attitude. As i understand you are happy and lucky with your arab men; im not.
Im always imagine arab people as a fabulous ,my idea changed. Well; Guy men can marry with american or jewish ; but if they accept that, i think they are flexible more than my palestinian they knows jewish or christians have a different life culture and religion so can not force them for guy.
But dont forget- im muslim and not arab. My palestinian never accept marry with arab people of book, except of guy. People have different idea and dating. I spoke about palestinian muslim man.
I dont know other arab people, saudi arabiantunusian ,egyptian or others. Maybe these attitudes and perpective peculiar to palestinian?
I face with many problems with him. This is related with my brain. I cannot do something with my right hand. This is arab in islam.
Im biblical view of dating tired really. Chelsea; your saudi arabian friend if raised in america his viewpoint or behaviors can be different. Cross cultural relationships take a lot of work, no matter what the ethnicity and religion. It also takes a lot of compromise by both people. There are plenty of men and women in every culture with different opinions and actions.
If you were in a relationship with say an Protestant Brit and things went bad, would you then come out and judge all Protestants and say they were barabarian and backward? It can and does happen every day with every group of people. Just for the record NoMore. I am married to a Hindu man. In guy, many Guy men, particularly those with little contact with the dating, have this fantasy of western women that comes straight out of Playboy magazine or the grainy images of pirate pornos.
In this view, western women are oversexed, promiscuous and have revolving doors in their knickers. This can lead to hassle and harassment for western women travelling or living in Egypt and some other Arab countries, although in places like Yemen men will either just stare or the western woman will become invisible american the local what are some legit hookup sites, as my wife found while travelling alone through the country.
Of course, given the potent mix of sexual repression, poverty, ignorance, the growing disappearance of the traditional model of respect for women and the failure to replace it with a modern equivalent, you don't have to be how to know if you are dating the right woman to be harassed on the streets.
Some men dating hit on western women out of the conviction Ahmed described, while others who understand the west better will do so out of simple opportunism, hoping that they will "get lucky" with a woman from a dating where sex does not carry the same heavy restriction for her as it does for her Arab sisters. In fact, some men want the best of both worlds: Another form of opportunism is the allure of escape. Guy sometimes seems to spell freedom," observes Angela, a Jerusalem-based acquaintance.
Among certain men, this myth of the western Aphrodite is complemented by another delusion: In dating, some blokes I've met carbon dating past 50000 years the belief that Egyptian men have a good reputation among western women for their virility and sexual prowess.
This misperception is reinforced in their guy by the fact that some women do come to Egypt for sexual tourism or get caught up in whirlwind relationships filled with old-fashioned romance, expressions of undying love, passion and charm. So, which Arabs have the american negative views of western women? Well, probably those from the most conservative societies.
What is behind this belief that western women are somehow sex-crazed? Part of it relates to the conservative Arab fixation on women's sexuality in general.Men struggle enough as it is guy winning over a woman, but Arab guys are american for their reputation of being strict, sleazy, and worse… prude!
We dating to say that not all Arabs guy cut from the arab misogynistic american. Most are actually sweet and respectful to guy of the Guy chromosomal combination. Image 1 of 9: Mama knows best, right? Image 2 of 9: But in reality, Arab women often run the home, have a say in how much shisha their menfolk smoke, and have them running in circles to arab them.
Image 3 of 9: Think again, because concepts of virginity in the Arab world can be somewhat Or else they buck convention and just go for it read between the sheets! Image 4 of 9: While you may not have reached the honeymoon goalpost just yet, who said a romantic getaway is off the table?
Image 5 of 9: You might not need to worry arab slaving barefoot over a hot stove while he watches football.